Take a breath! We made it!

It was a year ago today that I received the phone call that I was being laid off, and that the timeframe of the lay off was unknown. I remember the pain, the fear, the heart break that came with that. Back in October, 2018, when my brother, who I was working for at the time, decided to downsize his company, and therefore reduce my hours and pay, I felt this same way, yet somehow last year’s pain felt different in some way. I have had a job since I was 14 years old, and at 46, I had never been laid off, or lost a job. I know you’re saying it right now so I will say it for you, I have truly been blessed throughout my career. I truly have, and I am very aware of that fact!

If only I could have had a little more trust in God, and quite honestly a vision of what life would look like today, I would have handled things a bit better. Isn’t that what we all want? A clear vision or a roadmap of our future? It’s so hard when growing, and being stretched, and with life changes to just accept them and go with the flow. Or, for an OCD planner like me it is anyway. Life sure has a way of showing us we are not in control!

What a year it has been. I’ve been taught empathy for sure. Empathy for my former boss who had the financial burden of many on his back. I didn’t give him any credit for those decisions. Empathy for people who have lost many jobs throughout their lives, or who have struggled to ever really find a job that served their purpose in life. Empathy for all of those who were sick, or lost loved ones. Empathy for those who couldn’t pay their bills, feed their family, or remain in their homes. Our bills were paid, each one of them, we always had food on the table, electricity, running water, and no fear of losing any of that.

I learned to slow down and for the first time in 46 years really focus on what was important in life, and what I wanted. I’ve always been blessed with amazing jobs! I’ve been educated, and learned so much. Many don’t get that opportunity, but I had never stopped to find my why and my purpose in life! I never stopped to realize that I have a voice and a calling, and I wasn’t using it!

This past year I have seen my marriage grow in ways it never had. The most important relationship in my life has strengthened in ways I didn’t know possible. In a world that saw so many unfortunate divorces, our bond grew. For that I am thankful. I saw my husband’s support of me, and love for me, in a way I had never witnessed it. Each day re-assuring me that I was going to be okay and for me to find whatever it was I thought I needed. Never one time did he tell me I needed to go find a job.

Man do I wish that I had just enjoyed the season my life was in each and every day. I was handed several months to just be home, and I was consumed with fear almost every one of those days! You see, it’s hard to just be. It’s hard to be okay when you can’t see the whole picture. But why? Why is that? I have survived 100% of everything life has ever thrown at me, and you have too! What made me think this was going to be the big one that took me out? Sounds kind of crazy when you say it that way, right!? I wish I had listened to Martin Luther King, Jr’s wise advice when he told us that we didn’t need to see the whole staircase, just take one step at a time.

We are now in 2021! I was given an amazing opportunity with a company of growth minded individuals doing exactly what I love, finding my purpose, and being given the opportunity to use my calling. If you had told me a year ago that I would take a part-time job, and be happy about it, I would have told you that you were wrong. I have the opportunity to not only further my education, stretch and grow, but use all of that with some amazing individuals. Life has a crazy way of shaking things up in our lives! You see, I have learned that things don’t happen to us, rather they happen for us!

Why do I say those things to you today? Well, my hope is that maybe I can get you to just stop for a minute, and see alternatives that you otherwise wouldn’t see. Stop and take a breath. I am not saying these things to say look at me, I am blessed! I am blessed, but you didn’t see the sleepless nights, the weight gain and the absolute fear that I lived in for so many months. Maybe you have options like I did, that I was too scared to see, and after reading this, you will look for those options.

Much prayer, studying books and the Bible, working on my mindset and trusting God has led me to where I am today. Is life perfect, for sure no, but have I learned some very important lessons in life over the last year? Absolutely, and for that, I am beyond grateful! You see, the future may not be laid out in front of me, but for the first time, I am learning to be okay with that, and trust all will work for my good!

If you are still suffering from the pain of loss from the past year, please let me urge you to get professional help if you need it, or put in the hard, hard work to find healing and growth. Trust me, if I was able to do it, anybody can do it. Like I have said so many times in the past, will it be easy, no! Will it be worth it? A resounding YES! You see, I am learning that you have to be changed to bring change, and I for one want to see change in the world. I am just crazy enough to believe that I can help bring change, at least in my little world! I believe you can bring change too! It just takes listening, forgiveness and a whole bunch of hope! Oh, and always choose joy!

With love for you all,

Shauna