Who Encourages the Encourager?

I had an interesting question posed to me by a friend a week ago that I cannot quit thinking about. She looked at me and said you’re always the one trying to encourage others, who encourages the encourager? What a great question! Have you ever wondered who encourages the encourager? Who makes the comedian laugh? Who motivates the motivator? Who teaches the teacher? If we’re lucky, we have those people in our life! I am incredibly blessed in that regard! Go with me though, that’s not exactly where I’m going with this.

I’m a pretty open book. Those closest to me know over the past couple of years I have often been the one needing encouragement even though I try to be that for others. I think that’s why I try to encourage others so much. I try to be what I need, but when I stop to think about that for a minute, I realize not everybody is seeing the real me. Those who are not close to me on that level, never see me falling apart. To the outward world, I probably come across as the encourager. Only a select few actually know what is really going on in my life at any given time, and know that sometimes I am the one needing encouragement the most. That’s what really got me thinking about this question. We too often have no idea what people have going on behind the mask. Some of the ones smiling the most are the ones hurting the most.

What actually causes most encouraging people to be encouraging? Some people are just naturally born with that gift, but I believe for so many, they are being to others what they needed in a time of need. They have turned their pain around to use for good. Life has taught them to be more compassionate people.

In my years of battling infertility, I had nobody in my life who could relate. Yes my friends and family were compassionate, but none of them had really been through it. If you have never dealt with certain things in life, it’s hard to relate to somebody else going through it. Until you have dealt with hard things in life of any kind, it’s hard for you to relate to somebody dealing with those things. I don’t think I have a natural gift, I think I am using my pain for a purpose. I once had a minister tell me that there was purpose to my pain and I have been striving to be better, never bitter, and to use my experiences for good ever since. That has been the only way I could make sense out of some of my struggles.

I guess the only reason I even pose this question today, is because I think it’s important to realize we often do not know what is going on with somebody that they’re not allowing us to see. Just in the past two days I have had people reach out to me about a situation offering kind words, thoughts and prayers. It has meant the world to me. It’s in these times of compassion that it reignites a passion in my heart to show more compassion, and to double down on being that encourager.

So to bring this full circle, and answer my own question, who encourages the encourager? All of you encourage this encourager! Life is hard! We all have stuff! We need more encouraging and far less gossiping. We need more understanding and far less judgment. We need more giving people grace to handle things as best they can, and less writing them off, and talking about them. We need more positive and far less negative! I will leave you today with this question. What will you be to others that you have needed at some point in your life? Before you get tempted to judge someone else, stop and think about times in your life when you wished people had more compassion for you.

With love for you all,

Shauna