Boy what a time we find ourselves in right now. I just started my fourth week of being home. I have only gotten dressed out of sweatpants maybe once. I have only done my hair twice in 4 weeks. I can’t remember the last time I filled my car up. I have carried out pizza twice, otherwise, I have literally cooked every single day for the past month. I have barely worked out. I am baking like I own a bakery. I have deep cleaned my entire house, power washed the outside and mulched. I have been taking classes online every single day, reading, doing devotions and trying to grow during this. I am sleeping later than I would, and have only had 4 diet cokes in 4 weeks. I have had days where I was up and felt good, and days where I felt down and depressed and worried about the future. I have Facetimed and Zoomed more than I have in my entire life, but I am keeping in daily contact with some important people in my life and that feels good! Does any of that sound familiar?
All this down time has given me so much time to think. So much time to self reflect. So much time to think about my life, where I’ve been, and where I might be going. So much time to see that I have quite a bit to work on, but overall I feel proud of the fact that I do have ability to see my shortcomings and work on them. Overall I am proud of the growth I have had in my dark days and the blessings I see in my good days! Here are some things I have realized of late.
Sometimes you win some, sometimes you lose. Sometimes truth prevails, sometimes lies seem to be winning, but in the end, truth always prevails. We must always remember that! Friends will come and go, when they go, you will feel loss, sometimes like a divorce is happening, but you have to trust the process. Sometimes people aren’t meant to stay in our lives, sometimes they don’t even have our backs, but we fight to keep them there longer then they should be. Sometimes our journey leads us down paths we never saw coming, away from places we thought we would be, and that’s okay. Sometimes lies were told about us and people believed them, if they did, they were never a part of our journey to begin with. Sometimes life hurts and is hard, but just maybe that is because we’re not on the right paths, and headed in the right direction. Sometimes life is just hard to teach us something. Sometimes we must learn our place. Sometimes we must learn we can’t control everything. Sometimes we must learn that no matter how much we do, with some people we will never win, and that’s their choice! That’s okay!
We all have a journey! Our own journey. Seasons change. We grow, we change. People come and go. Life has ups and downs, but you know what, every day, we walk just a little farther on our journey of life. Some paths of my journey I am proud of. Some I would rather erase. Some I wish nobody saw, but the truth is, just like you, I have my own journey. I cannot change the past, I can only work on the future. I believe we are all going to come through this time changed, and I think we almost have to. For some reason, life had to stop for us. For some reason, we need to learn something. For some reason, we need to really take a look at what truly matters in life. So what will you do differently on your journey in the days to come? Hold on to hate and bitterness? Gossip? Stay the same? OR…hold on to hope and be grateful? Love? Will you realize people are doing the best they can and we all deserve a little grace and compassion? I heard yesterday that nobody is at their best in a crisis. We have to give people a break. We have to give ourselves a break above all else!
In the days ahead, I want to help myself and others get small wins every day. I want to applaud myself and others for doing the best we can! I want to be an encourager! I want to see the opportunity and come through this changed and different, and realizing that my journey may be headed down a different path, but it can be a great one, and change can be good. Likewise, maybe not much will change in my life, but I know I am changed, forever changed, and seeing life through a very different lens. You have heard me say before that I don’t like change, it’s scary, but at this point in my life, I see life had to change!
What will you do going forward? Embrace change or fight to stay where you were? Only you can make that decision! Only you can decide to come through this with a little more love in your heart!
With love for you all, Shauna
Shauna's Sisters 