Do you struggle with people’s opinion of you and what others think and say about you? I know I’m not alone in this struggle. I feel it’s human nature to want people to like us, care about us, support us, not talk about us behind our backs and never let us down. People are human though, we’re not perfect beings and there will be times people will let us down. They won’t mean to always, but they will let us down. Lord, we let ourselves down so how can we expect others not to let us down!?
I am the kind of person who wants to fix everything for everybody. The kind of person who tries too hard, at my own expense, but I think it’s just in my nature to be this kind of person, so I have to expect that I’m going to get hurt. I don’t know any other way to be, and I don’t think God would want me any other way. I have hurt people, I have let people down, but never intentionally. I have a big heart, and would never intentionally hurt anyone, but at this stage in my life, I realize there are a lot of people who I have obviously hurt and lately, I have felt it maybe better, or should I say safer, to just retreat and stay in my own little world with just a few people that I deem to be safe. Ever feel that way?
I have a family member going around town telling anybody that will listen that I will have nothing to do with them. That is 100% not the truth in how this went down, but at this point, I don’t have the strength to defend myself. I have a friend who I have known the biggest portion of my life who no longer treats me the same way, obviously over something she’s been told. At first I wanted to fight back and tell her she doesn’t now the whole truth, but again, I’m tired and don’t want to defend myself. And…there’s another one who has been telling people that I (I won’t use the word they used) screwed them over. Again, there’s way more to the story, but I don’t want to go there either. I’m not saying I am totally innocent in any of those situations, but I also cannot take full responsibility and put all the blame on myself like the devil has been wanting to do lately to drag me down, to keep me silent, to keep me feeling alone, undeserving and fighting within myself.
Have you ever experienced anything like I list above? I’m sure you have. So why is it in life that we focus on those few people who choose to attack us, instead of the large amount of people who think we’re pretty great. Who think we’re kind, loving, always there for them, even if there is sometimes distance due to life, and who wants to cheer us on? I recently listened to a Rachel Hollis podcast where she interviewed John Maxwell. John says anytime you’re in leadership or just living life, you’re going to have people talk about you and judge you, and say untrue things about you. You just have to know it’s going to be but no matter how much it may hurt sometimes, you have to keep going. We cannot live a life of purpose if we are always being drug down by what people are saying about us. You’re always going to make somebody mad, not be enough for them, not be there enough, not do and say the right things. ALWAYS! Sometimes people just look to others and judge and say things out of their own insecurities and hurt.
I am saying this to myself today because the past few days I have really let myself get down about this. I have never been one to have any trouble making friends, getting along with others and being a team player. Never in my life. It’s not even in my nature. It just seems sometimes that we let people in, let them get too close and then when we get hurt, we want to just turn inward and decide that never again is anybody getting in. Has it ever occurred to us though, that maybe it wasn’t in God’s plan for you to remain close to that person in where you’re going? Doesn’t make them a bad person, doesn’t make you a bad person, but maybe they are not a part of your destiny. Can you forgive them, can you forgive yourself and just know you must love them from a distance and that’s okay for you? If you try to look ahead and at the bigger picture, you might realize that to grow, there are some people you can’t take along on your journey.
I urge you today, this Easter weekend, to not focus on the naysayers. Don’t focus on the negative, don’t focus on the gossip, or the hurt. Focus on the blessings in your life. There is somebody who loved us so much that he died for us. I’m not sure there’s anybody else in my life that would make that kind of sacrifice for me so today, I know that I am loved, and you are too! Focus on that love and all the love that really is all around you. Maybe it’s only a handful of people that truly know and love you, but isn’t that enough? Don’t let a few people steal your joy!
With love for you all,
Shauna
Shauna's Sisters 